trust

why is trust the easiest thing to decide you want but the hardest thing to give someone else? i would be absolutely lying if i were to say that i trust certain people with all my heart the way i should. the problem is that no matter how much i know deep down that i should trust certain people it comes so difficult for me because of my background. i have grown up around people who are so much less than truthful; they lie, cheat and steal to get what they want and somehow that has left me jaded now that the time has come to put my trust into something so important. don't get me wrong, there are people that i trust absolutely, but others that i should trust and want to trust come so hard and i hate it! i hate that they feel like i dont trust them like i should and that i dont give them enough credit for doing the right thing. i know how it feels to have someone not trust you when all you do is strive to be the person they want you to be and yet i still find myself doing that same thing. over the past few months a lot of what i have gotten used to (not good things of course) has come to my attention and i am trying more and more every day to get rid of those things that keep me from letting all my walls down and clearly i need to still try harder, but eventually itll happen and everything will fall into place just like i have always wanted and imagined. that is my new resolution...to give people the trust they diserve no matter what i may feel deep down because i refuse to let those who caused me to not trust ruin a great thing for me because know i deserve that happiness!